This was my facebook status update after he arrived yesterday morning:
"I haven't seen my dad since Xmas. He walked in the front door today and says "You gained weight". That's my dad. Sigh."
Thanks for all the replies of support after that post. But for those of you worried about my delicate sensibilities, don't be. This is my dad we're talking about here. He has all the subtlety of a pounding migraine headache. I'm used to it. He wasn't trying to be mean or hurt my feelings, he was just stating the facts as he saw them. To be honest, I had just admitted the same thing to myself and I was wearing a slightly fitted shirt. All of this contributed to the perfect storm of fatherly truthfulness.
Well, he's on his way back home now. We can all return to our regularly scheduled lives. And just to clarify, I love my dad. He can just be a little labour intensive and seems to be lacking the ability to filter his thoughts before they come vomiting out of his mouth. That's all.