Thursday, October 31, 2013

Halloween bust.

Again. This neighbourhood is so full of elderly people that we get very few visitors. That coupled with the fact that our street has no streetlights and the people at either end are Halloween grinches, the kids never make it into the middle where the cool kids live, and the residents give out sweet full-sized choccies. The doorbell (okay knocker) went less than half a dozen times, and it was all people who knew us. No strangers. Boo. Everyone's seen my horns and spooky eyes before.

At least it was 5 which is about 3 more times than previous years so it's getting better around here. We got the typical cute little kids in the fuzzy costumes first, then the preteens in the homemade costumes then the 2 teens who showed up one with a Scream mask and street clothes and the other with a regular scarf around the bottom half of his face. Not even a kerchief to say he was a cowboy. Wow. Way to go with zero effort, boys. That kid will probably be my doctor in the old folks home. The mind boggles.

My favourites were Erica and James who came to my place dressed as the Paper Bag Princess and Tom Baker's fourth Doctor Who. Loved it.

I ended up watching the Rocky Horror Picture Show with Audrey on tv and, man, is that movie awful without an enthusiastic crowd. Still had fun yelling at the tv, though but the kids were thoroughly baffled. I can't believe I've seen that movie around 2 dozen times. Wait, yeah I can. It's awesome.

So anyway, it's time to put my contact lenses away for another year. Maybe next year I'll get invited to a party so I can really enjoy this Halloween stuff. I'm still on the fence about it.


Wednesday, October 30, 2013

A rattled sigh

That was my reaction five minutes ago when I realized I hadn't blogged yet. When I have nothing interesting, thought provoking or funny to say, I always feel that way. Then I write some kind of crap like what's happening before your eyes and pass it off like a proper blog post, and everyone loses. Sorry, guys. My life has just been a bit boring for the last few days. But that's good, isn't it?

I'm okay with it but it wreaks havoc on this blog.  I'll leave you with a funny from school.

Me (leaving for the day): Bye everyone! See you tomorrow!
Kid (running after me): Morah Karen, don't leave!
(flattered, I crouch down for the inevitable hug)
Me: Awww, sweetie. Are you going to miss me?
Kid: Nope. (he veers away and runs off)



Tuesday, October 29, 2013

At 2:01 today I...

Was having a snack. My life is a thrill-a-minute, I tells ya...

There's cheese in there...


Monday, October 28, 2013

Random Weekend Firsts

I was thinking about the excellent weekend I just had, and I realized that it was riddled with firsts that I'd love to share with you kind folks. Here we go...

--First time I drove all by myself to Montreal (just like a big girl)

--First time in 30 years I saw Cyndi Lauper in concert (she's still a goddess)

--First time I saw people (women and sadly men) over 40 dressed like Cyndi Lauper (and I hope to never ever see that again)

--First time in about 20 years that I saw my amazing and talented friend Kathy Kathleen and met her gorgeous hubby and smarter-than-my-kids kids.

--First time I ever got hit on by, not one, but two drunk lesbians (I swear I thought for sure I was going to get kissed)

--First time I ever saw a heating grate that big in the middle of a hallway in a house and stood over it like Marilyn Monroe in the Seven Year itch (minus the white dress, the figure and the... well, Marilyn)

--First time I ever had a knitting lesson that I couldn't pause and rewind (Thanks Kathy Kathleen! You are a fabulous knitter and I want to be you when I grow up)

--First time I ever went on a cool excursion and didn't take even one good photo (I got some super shitty ones at the concert but not one of Kathy Kathleen and me together, her funky house or beautiful family). Aaarrghh!!

So how was your weekend?


Thursday, October 24, 2013

Well, I'm going to bed.

I worked, rushed home to bake cookies for a staff meeting, went to a staff meeting then came home and cried for 20 minutes straight because Jeremy finally told everyone that Bonnie was dead. They held her funeral (and Tyler came!) where Bonnie relayed a personal message to everyone through Jeremy (who can see dead people). Can you blame me for being wiped out?

kxx (it's the Vampire Diaries... try to keep up)

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Well, ain't that a kick?

A few months ago I picked up O Magazine. I'd never read it before outside of doctor's offices, but the issue with her in the ginormous afro cracked me up. It was about the ups and downs of hair and the reason I shave my head is because of every single annoying thing you can think of in regards to having it. I've blogged about it in the past so I won't repeat it, but it's gold, trust me. Just put "hair" in the search box. I just read that sentence back and ew.

So I bought the issue, read all the good stuff then for some reason felt compelled to write a letter thanking her for it.

And what did that crazy sister do? She printed it. I need to say that she (and I say "she" even though I'm well aware that Oprah herself probably never went anywhere near my letter) only printed a fraction of the letter and didn't include the photo I sent either. But I get it. She rarely lets anyone else share the cover so why would she put that amazing, frame-ready photo of Audrey and me on the letters page?

So anyway, that's the story. My first time reading that magazine and my first time writing a letter, and it got published. Now how can I channel this good luck into cash?


Tuesday, October 22, 2013

At 2:01 today I was

Trying to burn off some stuff on the DVR with my constant companion. Of course shortly after these photos were taken, I was drooling into the leather couch, and she was off busy with very important cat business. Oh well, the best laid plans, eh?

Modern Family is one of Archie's faves



Monday, October 21, 2013

Monday Schedule

Mondays aren't ideal but when they include a vigorous exercise regimen and a busy (but fun... remember I'm a teacher) school day, it really makes for a day that I'm happy to see end. Here was my schedule:

5:30- Alarm goes. It's pitch dark. Are you serious?

6:00- Resplendent (great word for a Monday, amirite?) in my exercise togs, breakfast, lunch, clothes and swim stuff (the kids are swimming today) packed, I leave the house. I scare the 2 giant raccoons away from the garage door (where the compost bin is now overturned) and head off.

6:30- The ass-kicking otherwise known as bootcamp begins. Ryan, the instructor, is particularly kind as his sports team won over the weekend. He really gets mean when they lose. Like, five minute planks mean.

7:15- Bootcamp over, I haul my sweaty, sore, exhausted butt to the showers, wishing the day was already done.

7:30- Feeling energised by the hot shower, I'm ready to start my day. I go to my classroom and start tidying up from the weekend use of the space, cutting out dinosaurs (it's Prehistoric Week!), preparing the carpet area for Circle Time, choosing a book for storytime, doing the paperwork (attendance sheets and programme logs) and deciding how to make the room look like Jurassic Park. Minus the mayhem (hopefully).

8:30- The kids start coming in. Unfortunately, it's pouring rain so the kids are starting their day indoors rather than in the more manageable play-yard. Thanks loads Mother Nature...

After all the kids arrive it's a blur of activity including swim time which is 45 minutes in the water and easily 45 minutes getting dressed and undressed. Think about a being that has only been alive for around 1100 days, then picture that being putting his or her own rolled up socks on damp feet. Then multiply that by 13. Like I said... the day was a blur. All of a sudden it was the end of the day.

1:00- I head to the library to return the books I borrowed. Hopefully they won't notice the sticky tape surgery job I did on "Too Pickley".

2:30- Now I'm home and blogging. I can't wait to get off and play with Idris for an hour before I have to make dinner.

Oh the life of a teacher, wife and mother. And daughter... oooh, that reminds me, I have to remember to call my dad.


Thursday, October 17, 2013

Where's your head at?

Please enjoy the Basement Jaxx video that inspired the title.

Well, that and the actual question of where my head is at these days. Here's what happened:

Scott and I have been talking about taking the kids to Disney during the holidays. Today when he came to pick me up from work, he said "I have 2 surprises for you. First, I just got off the phone with the condo guy, and I booked the week we wanted for our trip!"

My response: "All right! That's so great. Well, we're going to have such a terrific holiday! So what's the other surprise?"

He leans over and picks up a small box and throws it in my lap. I look at it and start squealing and carrying on like it was an engagement ring. What was in the box? A $12 electronic ukulele tuner. I wish I was kidding.


Wednesday, October 16, 2013

I find it odd that "football" is the word that came up

When I have a hard time coming up with a post idea, I go to a website that gives me prompts. Today it told me to open a page of the closest book, stab your finger at the text and use the word in the title of the post. Of all the words possible in the venerable tome "Ukulele For Dummies", I never thought the word "football" would be one I'd hit. It's probably the only time it comes up in this book. Just for context, it's in a section teaching you how to read notes in a staff using an alternate to "every good boy deserves fudge". It explains that you can use (and I quote) "other F-words that boys enjoy (such as football)."

Um, yeah. Football.


Surprisingly this came up when I Google imaged "ukulele football"

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

At 2:01 today I was

In the middle of a heavy conversation with Scott. We were busy so I just shut of the alarm and kept on talking. Nothing you guys should worry your pretty little heads about but I didn't get a pic for today. So please enjoy a photo of the 2 of us together from last year. Just picture us chit chatting on the couch with the news network on in the background.


Thursday, October 10, 2013

Ass kickings galore.

I seriously just kicked the ass out of "You Are My Sunshine" on the ukulele tonight (YouTube is made of awesome). Which is great because I have a cough that's currently kicking my ass and I felt the need to reciprocate somehow.

So here's the current score:

Idris and me: 1
Wheezy, yucky cough that's making me pee and keeping me from going to boot camp: 1

But I consider that a win/win because, well, no brutal boot camp at 6:30 tomorrow morning. Yay!




Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Thanksgiving menu

So my daddy is coming with his wife for dinner Sunday. Yes, I still call him "daddy"... wanna make something of it? Anyway, We're having the usual, turkey, stuffing, mac & cheese (that's a usual holiday dish at our house), salad and some kind of potato. That's where you guys come in.

I always do roasted potatoes but I think I'd like to try something different. We're not fans of scalloped and I'm not sure I want to add the deep fat dryer to the heat of the kitchen so fries are out. So do you have any tried and true (and yummy) potato recipes that I've simply got to try?

Aaaannnnd GO!


Tuesday, October 8, 2013

At 2:01 today

I was actually doing nothing to do with my ukulele. I was coming home from the craft store. I always spend way too much money in those places. Today I'm making something I found on Pinterest. I don't know how many times I find myself saying that. Anyway, it's a "mood bottle" for my class. It's a bottle of water with sparkles that take a while to settle so that the kid calms down while watching it happen.

Hopefully it won't turn out to be a disaster like so many Pinterest projects do...


Monday, October 7, 2013

Sometimes I can be so self-indulgent

About a week ago I got a bee in my bonnet about a ukulele. It's all I could think about. I did research, I went on YouTube and finally yesterday morning hit up my friends on Facebook for any and all information I could get on this instrument. It was the largest number of responses I got to a post in my facebooking history. That was it. I was getting one that afternoon.

After Scott laughed at me for indulging myself in yet another lark, I found a store that was open Sundays and zoomed out there in the rain. I asked the guy all the questions I researched "Will I need a pitch pipe?" No, you can just use an ipod app. "Is this the best size and for a beginner?" Yes, this is the only size there is. "Are you sure this is the price? It's pretty cheap!" Yup, $32 all in. "Are there any more colours in the back?" You mean green, orange, blue, white, pink, black and red aren't enough for you? (Poor guy).

I made my choice (TARDIS blue) then Audrey and I drove to the nearest bookstore to buy Ukulele for Dummies. We even named her along the way (Idris... naturally, it's a Doctor Who reference)

I got her home and we practiced together for over 3 hours. And guess what, you guys? I already learned enough chords to play Twist and Shout (thanks YouTube!). Of course that chord number is a staggering three but who cares? I feel like a musician which is something I've ever been described as before. And I've been described as a lot of things, trust me.


PS: I was so set on getting a ukulele yesterday that I decided to park on a pretty busy street. Parallel park which is something I rarely never do. But look what I did in one try. Now, that's determination.


Thursday, October 3, 2013

I love working with kids.

Me: What's wrong, kiddo?
Kiddo: That kid is bugging me!
That kid: I'm a kid, not a bug.

Kid: Do you have a bum bum?
Me: Of course I do!
Kid: It's a big one.

Kid: Are you a boy or a girl?
Me: Which one do I look like?
Kid: Both.


Things I've heard myself say:

"Please don't sit on your apple."

"Stop punching the rocketship."

"Countdown to Space Lunch!"

"Everyday I'm shuffling." (I was actually shuffling. UNO cards)


Things I've heard them say:

"She pushed me off the toilet!"

"Wearing jeans tickles"

"How do you say Santa Claus in Hebrew?"

"My dried mangoes have venom and seeds in them." (It took me ages to figure out that he meant vitamin c)

Two girls were making little sand piles together:
"You are going to want to watch out for that cake. It's poisoned."


Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Random photos, anyone?

There's an option in blogger to insert photos which I always try to do so you don't get too bored with my ramblings. One of the buttons I can choose is to add a photo I'd previously posted to the blog. I just went through it oohing and awwing and thought, "I'm posting these again". Odds are you haven't seen them unless you've been reading every post since my MySpace days. Even I barely remember posting these the first time.

Oh, and word of warning... there are a lot of them.


Baby Elliott. Back when I could control him. Oh, the days...

Look how hairy we were

Blogging circa 1992. Dig the ancient "laptop"

My dad in the '70s. He had that car painted gold shortly after because, in his words, "silver is for second place"

What can I say? Henry's still the weird one

Subtract hair and add fat to the previous photo and you get this one

Elliott had just kissed her on the cheek. Sadly, I don't think they have this reaction anymore.

Always wear a helmet, kids.

Awww... looka dat baby girl

Me and a Ferengi. He was holding my hand down because I threatened to perform the umax. Look it up Star Trek non-nerd

I loved this dress in the movie. I don't remember which movie.

My mommy!

Another baby Elliott photo. This is that whole first baby gets all the photos syndrome.

My first sunburn. I don't know how you... ummmm... fair-skinned people do it.

I laughed so flipping hard when I first saw this one

And talking about laughing, this is one of my favourite dragonboat pics. I always feel like this after a race

The sexy beast puts out the garbage

"What happened to that guy?"

Look how much we look alike

Mr. Monopoly

And the pope. Both made by me, thankyouverymuch...

Me and my first pair of designer shoes.  We're in a serious committed relationship now.

Me and the kids resting our feet after a chocolate factory tour of Brussels

They used to call this "the school game"

Me and my teammates working hard

The most points I ever got at Words With Friends plus I got a case of the giggles so it was a double win

This was the costume at the first Ottawa Comiccon that made me interested in Steampunk

Tuesday, October 1, 2013

At 2:01 today I...

Was still at work, covering for a co-worker who was absent. I was having a ball. Literally... we were at the gym. Oh and don't tell anyone I liked working overtime.

Okay, I admit it, it wasn't exactly 2:01 but it took me a few minutes to get a shot without kids in it. You know... legal stuff.