Me: What's wrong, kiddo?
Kiddo: That kid is bugging me!
That kid: I'm a kid, not a bug.
Kid: Do you have a bum bum?
Me: Of course I do!
Kid: It's a big one.
Kid: Are you a boy or a girl?
Me: Which one do I look like?
Things I've heard myself say:
"Please don't sit on your apple."
"Stop punching the rocketship."
"Countdown to Space Lunch!"
"Everyday I'm shuffling." (I was actually shuffling. UNO cards)
Things I've heard them say:
"She pushed me off the toilet!"
"Wearing jeans tickles"
"How do you say Santa Claus in Hebrew?"
"My dried mangoes have venom and seeds in them." (It took me ages to figure out that he meant vitamin c)
Two girls were making little sand piles together:
"You are going to want to watch out for that cake. It's poisoned."