How do I hate camping?

Let me count the ways:

1. the dark (city dark is entirely different from country dark)
2. the quiet (ditto the above)
3. the chit chat (with the absence of electronic distractions, you are forced to actually converse with one another. What do you talk about?)
4. the lukewarm hot food (nothing says camping like room temperature hot dogs)
5. the lukewarm cold food (ditto the above but replace hot dogs with macaroni salad)
6. sand in every orifice (there is nothing fun about excavating sand from the folds of my ears)
7. dirty feet (yuck from the pedicure queen).
8. no makeup (sorry, but it's necessary for me)
9. early bedtime (bed at sunset? what am I, 3?)
10. unable to cook (I'm aware that to some, this could be construed as a gift but I'm not some. And barbeque does not count as cooking)
11. unable to clean (see sand and feet posts above)
12. nature (I like my nature on the Discovery channel, thank you)
13. noises (do you really need me to be asking "what's that?" every 10 minutes?)
14. never completely comfortable (I could never really relax with all the above nonsense rattling around my head. Could you?)
15. I have nothing else... I just hate having a weird number of these.

I've mentioned these things before but lately Scott's been talking about purchasing a cottage property. Just the property. Not the cottage. He says that in a few years we can put a trailer on it then a little house, then a cottage. So I think the plan basically means that by the time we retire we can be assured of something with a roof on the land. In the meantime we'd have our very own camping spot.

Don't get me wrong... I'm delighted about potentially getting it. I think it's cool that we could be the owners of waterfront property so close to the city. I just hope it doesn't cause too many arguments when I flatly refuse to sleep in a pitched tent on the property next summer. Anyway, it's all moot anyway until we actually get it. If we get it. I'm okay both ways.

kxx