I shatter the 10th commandment on a daily basis but after yesterday's antics I'm going straight to hell. Do not pass "GO", do not collect $200.
I had to buy some perfume and since my tastes run pretty fancy, there's only one store in town that stocks it. It's the chichiest store in town so I dressed up and headed out. After spending an unGodly amount of money (I may as well go all the way), on a whim I asked the saleslady where the shoe section was. As I went up the escalator with my heart hammering in my chest, I knew I'd find my holy grail. Louboutin shoes.
And there they were. In their red soled glory. The shoes I've wanted my whole shoe-loving life. As I turned them over I saw their amazing red soles. And also their prices. Yowtch. Sweat started to bead on my upper lip. The salesgirl came over and asked if she could find a size for me. "Any of these in a 9, please", I gasped. She came out with only one pair, apologising that the new stock would be in in the Fall. The pair she thrust at me was my least favourite pair on display... a relatively low, plain black number with copies available at any Payless but these were Louboutins, dammit. Louboutins. I practically snatched her arm off.
Luckily I had my camera with me. That way I could make a complete ass of myself. But I didn't care. I had Louboutins on my feet. Louboutins. I walked around the store with those painful shoes on (did I ever mention that I have very wide feet?) like they were the comfiest pair of bunny slippers. I snapped photos of my feet from every angle. Then I sadly and gently put those $795 dollar shoes (you heard) back in their box and returned them to the woman. She gave me her card and assured me that with a weeks notice she could have a size 9 in any style I wanted. As if she couldn't tell just from looking that I could barely afford the box the shoes came in.
At least I can say I had Louboutins on my feet. Louboutins. I've seen the face of God. Now everything else looks pale in comparison.