Tuesday, June 29, 2010

You know what makes me nervous?


Coffee. That's what makes me nervous. Let me explain:

Legally in Ontario, you can't be on your cell phone or text in your car anymore. You just can't be distracted in any way. To be honest, I don't know why it's okay to have more than 2 kids in a car at any one time, though. Have you ever tried going anywhere with 3 screaming kids under 4 years old in a car? I actually used to yell: "You're gonna make mummy crash the car if you don't stop it!!". Yes, I know... another tick in the bad mother column.

Anyway, my point is distracted drivers. We've all seen the mascara applying woman and the crossword completing man. I've even seen a guy waving his penis around (I'm dead serious). But there's one thing that far more prevalent than these things. The drinker. And I'm not too disturbed that someone may "Kramer" themselves... those newfangled lids are admittedly pretty good. My issue is when you're nearly finished. I just took a last sip of my tea and realized it's impossible to see around the cup. Try it. How many times have I seen someone drinking on the road? Any minute now, they're going to reach the bottom of that container. Head thrown back while driving to suck out every drop. They may as well have a catcher's mitt in front of their faces. Scary.

Far be it for me to impinge on your civil right to do anything you want in your car, but shouldn't someone keep an eye on this?

Here's my list of things you shouldn't be allowed to do while operating your vehicle. Updated often...

Drink
Eat
Sleep
Make phonecalls
Have sex (of any kind)
Transport more than 2 children (unless you're a bus driver)
Argue
Change clothes
Cook
Apply makeup
Watch tv/dvd
Read
Listen to loud music
Write
Smoke
Shave your legs
Fix your hair
Play cards
Change your baby's diaper...

I could go on and on. Hey here's a thought. Why don't you just propel your car? People are getting pissed at your driving. You suck at merging and when you slow down in front of me after passing, I want to Kramer you. Grrrr....


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