Thursday, August 22, 2013

I had a dentist's appointment this morning

For most people it's just another appointment in the world of boring appointments but for me, the dentist is an ordeal. It probably starts 2 nights before the appointment with sleeplessness. Then it moves on to err... "gastric issues" for about 18 hours. When I finally get to the office, I'm sweaty and tense until they call me. Then I'm even more sweaty, and I'm so tense that my back is literally arched the whole time I'm on the chair. In fact, I think if you take the chair away, I'd be levitating. And my jaw is clenched so hard it's actually sore for a day after I'm done.

Nine times out of 10 I have nothing dire wrong with my teeth. I haven't had a cavity since 1979 (seriously) and I brush and floss every day so there isn't much scraping. So why all the fear? No idea.

I had braces for 5 years when I was in high school. Even my first crush was my orthodontist Dr. Samuel Israelovitch. He made me wear a humiliating headgear for years, but that's no reason to get the cold sweats before a dental appointment. Or maybe it is...

Oh dear lord, it was just like this one. Do they still make kids wear them? No wonder I had no social life...

Anyway, I'm safe now until February. I'll just keep flossing and massaging my gums and maybe I'll stave off the err... "gastric issues" next time. But I wouldn't bet on it.


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