Tuesday, July 11, 2006

French sex

My friend whose name I won't mention (See Jo? I can keep a secret) was just telling me that she recently had sex in French. She's fluently bilingual but didn't understand half the things he was saying to her. And who says love is an international language? But I had to laugh. People actually talk during sex?

I don't want to get too graphic but I don't like to talk. I need to concentrate. I have work to do. Talking makes my mind wander then suddenly I'm mentally making tomorrow's grocery list or wondering why we're at this so late and I really should be getting more sleep as a general rule. Or worse yet, talking will lead to uncontrollable giggling. And not the good kind.

I guess having 3 kids in 2 bedrooms on either side of our room necessitates some sort of silence but we never talked even before kids. That's not to say there wasn't noise, thank you very much, but no actual words. What do people say, anyway? Give instructions? I can hear it now:

-Okay now put that leg over there.
-Like this?
-OW! Not there, here.
-How's that?
-Ooof. Better.
-Now let me get around to this side...
-That reminds me... do we have any more of those soft pretzels?
-Never mind. Where were we?

God, I'm such a prude. Does everyone talk but us?

Post a Comment