Friday, October 17, 2008

So this is the blog I was talking about yesterday. Hope you like it...

The other day I was looking out my window and saw my neighbour Linda walking out of her house with Nordic Walking poles. She used to go out with her arms swinging and a light jacket but now she has equipment.

Remember when walking was the cheapest thing you could do for exercise? All you needed were a couple of feet and you could get a reasonable workout. It's like what they did to muffins. Remember when muffins were healthy? Neither do I.

Now, it seems in order to get an optimal workout you have to have these poles that make you look like you're dry-land training for some weird Olympic sport. Well actually, no weirder than Olympic race walking I guess.

It's like there was some kind of meeting:

Rich Evil Executive #1: We've got to make this walking thing more lucrative for ourselves.
Rich Evil Executive #2: I know! If too many people do it they could get fit without spending any money.
REE1:(shudder) Horrible. What do you propose?
REE2: Let's do what we did to running. All you needed was a pair of running shoes. We made it so you need "Cool Max" and "Nike+" and an initial outlay of at least $200.
REE1: Good. Good. So what do people do when they walk?
REE2: They wear shoes...
REE1: That boat sailed when we sold the unsuspecting public sneakers with air in them. I'm still giggling over that one.
REE2: Heehee! Well, they swing their arms...
REE1: Ooooohhh.. I think you may have something there. Could we put something in their hands? Something that'd cost a fortune? Something they can't do without? That they'd look like fools without?
REE2: Ummm ski poles?

Now people are forced to look like they're participating in a fraternity hazing ritual. And a little bit of me wants a set. Sigh.

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