|This is probably the expression on his face after I was through with him|
Bad news? It was a telephone interview. That one was a blow. I really thought I was going to get to go backstage especially since the top 10 would be in Ottawa just a few days later. Ah well. As I say to the kids: "You get what you get and you don't get upset." Plus I made such a hash of this that meeting him in person would have been humiliating.
I won't be any competition for Barbara Walters. I tried hard to not gush and talk about myself, but my god, that's not the way I am. I'm so used to a conversation being a give and take (and mostly I give till it hurts) so this was hard for me. Here are some of the interview highlights (I'm so glad I can still take notes on the fly... wahoo public education). I'll comment on my asinine interview techniques in brackets...
Me: Greetings from the Great White North.(the idiocy begins) Have you ever been to Canada?
Emilio: I have. I've been to Montreal, Toronto and Vancouver.
Me: Fabulous. I'm from Montreal myself and now I live in Ottawa (See how I already brought that back to me? I'm so awful at this and it gets worse)
Emilio: Oh. Nice. (See? He doesn't care. God help me)
Me (Here's when I started to realize that this interview is going to be a shit show so I made a conscious decision to be upfront about how it was going to go. Which was badly): I don't know where they got the information for me to do this interview but I'm just a mum and a big fan of the show. My blog literally gets less that 30 hits a day. So just let me get all my gushing out before I ask you any real questions. (Here I bizarrely started taking huge breaths as if I was in labour. God, I wish with all my heart that we had gotten cut off at this point.)
Emilio: Okay perfect... no worries (poor guy)
Me: So fingers crossed the show is picked up for another season, would you like to come back as an all-star or a choreographer? (hey look... a lucid question!)
Emilio: Of course, I'd want to be either one of those but I'd definitely want to be an all-star since the choreographer jobs are harder to get to.
Me: Are you still in I.aM.mE? (this is a dance crew with some other dancers we've seen on previous seasons)
Emilio: There's one girl Jaja that auditioned with me...
Me: (Interrupting rudely): SHE WAS AMAZING! (ohmygod, I'm an idiot)
Emilio: (ever gracious): Yeah... anyway I was talking to her and we're getting her papers in order... it was tough that she didn't make it but it's a good setup for next season if they have it. She's been taking classes and working out and when I see that I just assume she's getting prepared for season 12.
Me: I'll be rooting for her if she makes it. Now, I know that when I hear a song on the radio that you have used on the show, it brings me right back to the performance that I saw. In fact, I have a playlist on my iPod called SYTYCD (shit, I was doing it again). I was wondering, is there a song that you hear that you'll never forget the choreography that you learned?
Emilio: Ah, man... that is actually a good question. (YES!!!). There are so many choreographies that I've done and I can't really remember them all but... it's a really random song from when I took a class in 2010 and I danced to a song called Oscar The Grouch. I definitely remember that choreo and that was 4 years ago and I'd been only dancing for 2 years.
Me: I can't believe you've only been dancing for since 2008. You have a gift.
Emilio: I was surrounded by really good people who were willing to help me.
Me: Your family must have been a really good support as well. (Look at being all professional... finally)
Emilio: At first dance was just a hobby but when it became serious and I dropped out they still supported me. They didn't want me to have regrets so that made it easier to make the hard decisions like dropping out of college.
Me: That's really good to hear. (Now here's where I go off the rails again). I myself have an 18 year old son and he's driving me nuts. He doesn't know what he wants to do with his life. I wish he had a passion like dance is for you. I'd do anything if he'd show interest in something other than gaming. But that's my issue. (No kidding. Seriously? THIS is the time to bring up your frustration with your kid? UGH!!)
Emilio: Oh that's fine (He was so great to indulge me and not hang up on me). Eighteen is a tender age. He'll figure it out.
Me (regathering my
Emilio: I'm a nerd actually. I majored in mathematics in College. If I didn't follow my passion for dance, I would have continued in my major. But I left 18 months in with 18 left to go. That's definitely the career path I would have chosen.
Me: Do you have time to watch tv? What do you like?
Emilio: Oh yeah... I watch The Walking Dead.It's a great show. It's perfect.
Me: I imagine you get asked the same questions all the time. So here's something else not dance related: Do you like junk food? Sweet? Salty? Both? (Really? This question? Over any others? Double ugh.)
Emilio: Always sweet or sour candies. My friends know to get me candy over presents.
Me: There are lots of Canadian candy that you don't get in the States. Coffee Crisp is one. It doesn't taste like coffee...
Emilio: I know this one! When I went to Vancouver, one of my friends told me to get one and it was amazing.It's great!
Me (I started out bad, got better but then I started to have a full-on psychotic break.): I'd love to bring you all some Canadian chocolate backstage. (I'm as subtle as a kick in the head about my desire for back stage passes. Not forthcoming)
Emilio: (clearly afraid, poor guy). I'd love that!
Me: I have 2 last questions and you choose what's first. The question about earworms or greeting cards? (Like I said. Full-on psychotic break.)
Emilio: Uhhh... earworms (Poor guy.)
Me: How do you get rid of an earworm? What's your best technique?
Emilio: Um. maybe the greeting cards. I've never had an earworm.
Me (doubtful): Do you know what it is? It's just when you get a song stuck in your head. I thought it was more widely known but maybe it's just a Canadian term. (I'm not sure about that one).
Emilio: When that happens to me I just literally tell myself to shut up. I'll just say "stop it" and "shut up" until it goes away.
Me: Okay, last question... when you get a greeting card, how long do you keep it for? (Oh my god.)
Emilio: Depends on the card and who it comes from. There are cards I've had around for almost 3 years. Otherwise, if it's just a get well card or something, it's just a few weeks.
Me: I have a mental problem (this is not new information and has become clearer in the 10 minutes of this interview). I will keep cards forever especially if something nice is written inside.
Emilio: That makes sense.
Me: It was so nice talking to you. (mewling now) I'm such a fan. I sat at the computer and bought the tickets for the show within minutes of them going on sale so I have 8th row seats. My daughter and I were high-fiving each other and whooping all over the living room. (Here's where I wish the earth had swallowed me up.) Do you know where you'll be staying so maybe I can get you the chocolate? Or is that weird?
Emilio (poor guy): I don't think we're staying anywhere. We'll be at the venue the whole day. (I'm such an idiot. How many times can I call myself an idiot in one post? I'm so not cut out for this interview shit)
Me: Well maybe I can find a way to sneak a basket in to you guys. (oh my god, give it up you colossal idiot). Because really you have to try some of the stuff we have. Maple candies... you haven't lived.
Emilio (laughing nervously): We'll see what we can do (poor guy)
Me: Well thank you so much for taking time out to talk to me and for making an old lady's day
Emilio: No worries... thank you for the interview
Me: Take care
And there you have it. My blog post/interview of shame. Be gentle with me.