Monday, February 20, 2012

I'm watching the Amazing Race

Season 20 started Sunday and out of every single reality game show out there, this is the one I could do. There are no tribes only you and your partner, there is no lying or backstabbing to get ahead and if you just play your game with your partner, without worrying about the rest of the field, you can get pretty far. Even if you don't, there really is no one to blame but yourselves, although the last few seasons have employed a couple of stalling tactics that can have another team pause you or make you do the other half of a challenge which can slow you down and affect your time. It's mean but not malicious like other shows where there can be real animosity between players.

One thing, though. I'd love to see a timer at the bottom of the screen while teams are completing tasks. It'd be fun to know that it took a team 2.5 hours to learn a choreography to a Swedish folk dance to the satisfaction of a hilariously costumed non-English speaking judge or pour 20 cups of tea without dribbling (the tea not the contestants). I'd love to know how long their flights are or how long it takes to drive to places.

Today I saw two contestant fail. One at driving a stick and the other freaked out having to parachute. Really? Have they never seen this show before? Seriously, it's been on for 20 seasons. Before I even dream about signing up for a show like this I'd learn to drive a standard vehicle (maybe even a truck), I'd brush up on my swimming. I'd get hypnotised to not freak out over bugs, heights or flying. I'd prepare myself for potentially having to eat something gross or humiliate myself in public either by begging or dancing. And I'd learn how to say "please", "thankyou", "internet", "toilet" and "help me" in at least 10 languages. This is the nature of the show, people. There's nothing that turns me against a team faster than the inevitable person freaking out over the drop zone crying in shock that they're afraid of heights or quivering on the edge of a diving board terrified that they have to swim. Ugh. Again I ask: Do you not have a tv? How on earth did you sign up for this show before overcoming your fears? Seriously.

Anyway, I'm looking forward to another awesome season and dreaming of there eventually being a Canadian version someday. I think I'd actually apply. Of course I'd have some self-improvement to achieve first...


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