Friday, September 23, 2011

What the hell are you wearing, woman?

So a few weeks ago I bought a pair of skinny jeans. Unfortunately when I put them on I didn't get any skinnier but they did look okay so I took the leap and bought them. I'm still on the fence about them and the irony there is I couldn't even scale, let alone get to the top of a fence while I'm wearing them. I can barely sit down. They are snug. Spanx snug.

I have no idea how to wear them. I seem to feel the need to wear mini dresses and long tops so that they look like tights. Or jeggings. Or whatever. I usually wear them with ballet flats but today I thought I'd try Converse. I chickened out when I looked in the mirror and saw a mutton dressed as a lamb and it was back to the ballet flats for me. It's enough that I'm a curvy girly in these sausage casing pants. I didn't need to look like a freaking 17 year old, fat, Black, lesbian, Justin Bieber fan.



Anyway, I'm still hot and cold on them. It definitely depends on my state of mind before I squeeze myself into them. That's one thing in the "pros" column about these pants. Nothing jiggles when they're on. I just have to ignore the spots that appear and disappear in my periphery after wearing them for a few hours. A definite "con". As I type this I've already switched to sweatpants. Blessed blessed sweatpants.

kxx

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