"Do you know how much you would pay for this in a restaurant?"

Scene:

A family of four sits at a suburban Montréal dinner table. The mother has been working all day as a nurse yet still cooked supper, the kids had been at school and the dad has been at work. The meal is the usual West Indian fare. As the mother places the steaming plate of dasheen, yams and curried chicken onto the table, the family yums their appreciation and tucks in. After a few minutes, she says it. The dreaded words: "Do you know how much you would pay for this in a restaurant?" Never mind that no circa 1980's restaurant in the whole town would serve anything as basic yet exotic as this. Then, the inevitable, random answer: "9.95 plus tax." No one ever skipped a beat although the kids would sometimes giggle and roll their eyes. She was obviously looking for some glimmer of appreciation. Passive-aggressively of course. Poor woman.

It's just another bizarre thing that went on in my house in St.Hubert. Now I'm aware that most families have their odd moments but mine seemed odder than most. I guess it's since my parents came to Canada as adults and never really lost their accents and Dominican weirdness. Let's call it eccentricity. Which, naturally has rubbed off on their Canadian firstborn daughter.

Yesterday as I served a scrumptious meal of ginger beef and sticky rice (it's actually a Canadian concoction that arrived here via the East), I remarked to the slurping crowd: "You know how much you'd pay for this in a restaurant? 21.95. Plus tax." Scott giggled and the kids rolled their eyes. Sigh. Those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it.

kxx

Personal for Mikey: I heard myself say daddy's famous: "Moves, man, MOVES! Hi-yi-yi!!" during Dancing With The Stars last night. When I start wearing mum's muumuus you have permission to come to Ottawa and put me out of my misery)

You know what is a fun family activity?

I'll tell you what. Not watching the movie Titanic. Saturday night the movie came on tv but the kids missed the beginning then had to go to bed before anything really happened. They seemed to really want to watch it so I promised I'd throw on the video (which I own) the next night. I honestly thought they'd forget. How many times will it take before I learn this lesson? Elephants never forget. And I have a some real Dumbos here.

So yesterday afternoon we all snuggle together on the couch to view the wonder and magic that is James Cameron's magnum opus. Nearly four hours later, 2/3 of the children are beside themselves (Henry and Audrey) and Elliott is surreptitiously swiping his face with his sleeve. Who knew they'd pay attention? I thought they'd see a rip-roaring adventure story but they got it. They got the romance and the loss and the sheer scope of what happened on that ship. I was impressed. And seeing them cry made me cry too. Again.

We spent almost the whole night talking about the story... what parts were true and what parts were made up. They seemed really interested. Henry even made a model of the Titanic out of his wooden blocks. Sometimes during the evening, Audrey would get all quiet with faraway eyes. It's funny how one minute you have 3 babies and the next you have a bunch of sensitive little people who really shouldn't be watching a man drawing a naked, reclining woman. Oops. So how was your weekend?

kxx

Mabel Eliza Anthony

She would have been 73 today. She was my mum and she died of stomach cancer 12 years ago. I miss her like crazy every day. Some random things I remember about her:

* Even though she sometimes snorted when she laughed, it was still really infectious
* She did an extremely politically incorrect imitation of someone speaking Chinese
* She had a salt and pepper afro that I hope to inherit someday
* She had the most enormous boobs of any living being I've ever seen
* She was exactly 5 feet tall
* Her nails were always daggerlike and polished to perfection
* She always had food stains on her clothes
* She was an awesome cook... I wish I had her recipe for bakes
* She was a great hugger and gave noisy, wet kisses with her gorgeous thick lips
* She rocked muumuus and huge earrings (think Mrs. Roper)
* She was a happy person and of all the things I inherited from her, I'm most grateful for that

Happy Birthday Mumsie. Daddy, Mike and I are sending up special wishes to you today.
Your daughter,
Karen
xox

Something happened to me today

Today I realized that I live in a movie. Either that or I live in a house full kids.

Case in point:
I was showering happily this morning. When I was done I pulled back the curtain. Henry was standing there quietly staring at me. He scared the crap out of me, too (no, not literally). If I'd been in a movie, there'd be screeching violins and a kook with a knife. Turned out my kook only wanted me to do up his belt.

Gotta love family life.
kxx

Love this joke

I've heard this one at least a dozen times but I still find it amusing. Especially since I have three kids of my own and things went exactly this way... at least for me.

kxx

Evolution of Mom

Yes, parenthood changes everything. But parenthood also changes with each baby. Here, some of the ways having a second and third child differs from having your first:

Your Clothes -
1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes are your regular clothes.

The Baby's Name -
1st baby: You pore over baby-name books and practice pronouncing and writing combinations of all your favorites.
2nd baby: Someone has to name their kid after your great-aunt Mavis, right? It might as well be you.
3rd baby: You open a name book, close your eyes, and see where your finger falls. Bimaldo? Perfect!

Preparing for the Birth -
1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
2nd baby: You don't bother practicing because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing.
3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your 8th month.

The Layette -
1st baby: You prewash your newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.
2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?

Worries -
1st baby: At the first sign of distress - a whimper, a frown - you pick up the baby.
2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.
3rd baby: You teach your 3-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.

Activities -
1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour.
2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.

Going Out -
1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home 5 times.
2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.
3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

At Home -
1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
2nd baby: You spend a bit of every day watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children

RIP Tiny Steve

Well that didn't last long. Or I should say "he"?

Poor Tiny Steve. And I thought I was doing well when I cleaned his brackish water yesterday. Obviously I upset his delicate balance of flora and fauna (thanks Lisa!) and he went artlessly belly up last night.

Poor Henry discovered the body at bedtime. I heard the wail from his room and at first thought he was pissed at Audrey for something as he had been most of the day. But that mother thing kicked in where you recognize different kinds of cries and I knew right away something was wrong. He came into the hallway and I kept asking him what the matter was and he couldn't answer. He just kept getting more and more upset. When I saw Tiny Steve my heart broke for him.

I held Henry and hugged him tight and told him how sorry I was. Scott heard the ruckus and came upstairs to hug him too. We talked about how fun it was to have Tiny Steve in our family even for such a short time then unceremoniously flushed him down the toilet. Henry turned down the "privilege" of doing the actual flushing and left that unfortunate duty to me. Poor kid. He hitched and sniffled all through.

What else could we do but agree to buy him another one today? When I came home from work they had picked out a beauty of a betta (easier to keep without a bubbler) and named him Couscous after tonight's side dish. Henry seems suitably appeased and peace reigns once again in the Kaye household. Phew.

kxx

(PS: Thanks to all for your votes yesterday but I lost to 2 14 year old girls. Apparently their network was bigger than mine. Hmph. There goes my washer and dryer)
k

Well this is interesting

I went and entered a "face of Springtime" contest over at one of our malls and I managed to get into the top 50. I need my nearest and dearest to vote their faces off for me and 2/3 of my spawn. So could you trouble yourselves to vote? The voting ends today. You know I love my bloggers most! Thanks in advance, folks.

kxx